WhatsApp Collection

घमंड पतन का लक्षण है.
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 कलह पर विजय पाने के लिए,
मौन से बड़ा कोई अस्त्र नहीं है. 
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 जिसने अपनों को वश में कर लिया,
उसकी जीत को देवता भी हार में नहीं बदल सकते.
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 अँधेरे से मत डरो,
सितारे अँधेरे में ही चमकते है.

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अपनी गलती मानने में कभी भी देर न करे, क्योंकि
रास्ता जितना लंबा होगा, वापसी उतनी ही मुश्किल हो जाएगी.
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अगर परछाई कद से और बातें औकात से बड़ी होने लगे तो,
तो समझ लो के सूरज डूबने ही वाला है.
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जितने वाले अलग चीज़े नहीं करते,
वो चीज़ों को अलग तरीके से करते है.
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आज अध्ययन करना सब जानते है पर,
क्या अध्ययन करना चाहिये, ये कोई नही जनता है.
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 तो तुम्हारी बाते सुनते हुए इधर-उधर देखे,
उस पर कभी विश्वास मत करो.
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जो व्यक्ति हर पल दुःख का रोना रोता है,
उसके द्वार पर खड़ा सुख बहार से ही लौट जाता है.
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 कभी पीठ पीछे आपकी बाते चले तो घबराना मत, क्योंकि
बात उन्ही की होती है जिनमे कोई बात होती है.
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 जीवन में कभी भी किसी को बेकार ना समजे,क्योंकि
बंध घडी भी दिन में दो बार सही समय बताती है.
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सबको इक्क्ठा रखने की ताकत प्रेम में है, और
सबको अलग रखने की ताकत वहम में है.
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 बदल जाते है वो लोग वक्त की तरह ,
जिन्हें हद से ज्यादा वक़्त दे दिया जाए.
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मंजिल पर पहोचना हो तो राह के काँटों से मत घबराना,
क्योंकि कांटे ही तो बढ़ देते है रफ़्तार कदमो की.
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 अहंकार और पेट जब बढ़ता है तब
इंसान चाह कर भी किसी को गले नहीं लगा पता.
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लोग चाहते है की आप बहेतर करे, लेकिन
ये भी सत्य है वो कभी नहीं चाहते के आप उनसे बहेतर करे.
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किसी के पैरों में गिरकर प्रतिष्ठा पाने के बदले
अपने पैरों पर चलकर कुछ बनने की ठान लो.
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 सबको उसी तराजू में तोलिए जिसमे खुद को तोलते हो,
फिर पता चलेगा, लोग उतने भी बुरे नहीं है जितना हम समजते है.
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जिस दिन आपको पता चलेगा के नेकी करने से मन को शांति मिलती है,
उस दिन आप बुरा काम करना छोड़ देंगे.


Whatsapp Status
दुनिया🌎 के हर रिश्ते को इतने बखूबी से निभाया है, 👍
दुश्मनों 👹 को Attitude से भगाया तो, अपनो 👥 को सीधा दिल💖 में बसाया हैं..
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मुझे  तलाश☺ है, जो मेरी  रुह😍 से  प्यार❤ करे,
वरना  इन्सान तो  पैसों 💸 से भी  मिल😎 जाया करते हैं..
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चार बोटल  पेपसी 🍶 Car मेरी टेक्सी…
phone 📱 मेरा गेलेक्सी  BF 💃mera सेक्सी…
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Life जितनी Hard होगी आप 👍उतने ही Strong ✌️बनोगे,
आप जितने Strong ✊बनोगे  Life उतनी ही 👉 Easy लगेगी👍..
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सुनो मैं 😎 ये नही ❌ कहता की वो  कोई 👌 खास हो,
मुझे 😈 वो चाहिए जो सिर्फ मेरे ही 👫 पास हो.. 😉
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मैं बुरी हूँ 😱 तो बुरी ही सही,😳
कम से कम शराफत का 👀दिखावा नहीं करती..
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नखरे 😁उतने ही दिखाओ😏,
जितने तुम्हारी शक्ल 🙇 पर सूट करें..
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👉 मै अपने अंदर के रावण को तो मार सकता हूँ,
पर अपने अंदर के 😘 इमरान हाशमी 😍 को कभी नही मरने दूंगा..
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निकाल दूंगा तुझे में अपनी_ज़िन्दगी से भीगे कागज़ की तरह,
ना लिखने के काबिल छोडुंगा ना जलने के. .
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जिसको तलब हो हमारी, वो लगाये बोली, सौदा बुरा नहीं, बस हालात_बुरे है. 
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चल एक ख़ूबसूरत गुनाह कर लें,
साथ दो पल का सही इश्क़ बेपनाह कर लें..
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तकदीर ने, दुनिया ने, मोहब्बत ने और तुम ने,
जिसने भी चाहा मेरा तमाशा बना दिया..
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और कोई नहीं है जो मुझको तसल्ली देता हो,
बस तेरी यादें है जो दिल पर हाथ रख देती है..
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हजारों हैं मेरे अल्फाज के दीवाने,
मेरी ख़ामोशी सुनने वाला कोई होता तो क्या बात थी..
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देख तेरी आँखे भी कमाल करती हैं,
मुझ से पर्सनल पर्सनल सवाल करती हैं..
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ज़िन्दगी में एक ऐसे इंसान का होना बहुत ज़रूरी है,
जिसको दिल का हाल बताने के लिए लफ़्ज़ों की जरुरत न पड़े..
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सुन छोरी देखेगी सपने मेरे चैन खो जाएगा,
ऐसे  ना देख पगली ♀ प्यार हो जाएगा..
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दिल को Dettol में भिगो कर रख पगली,
ऐ  Ishq♡ बड़ी Viral बीमारी है...
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तूम हो तो बसंत है,
तूम नही तो बस-अंत है..
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Sweetheart तुम्हारी चूड़ी है या एक्सीलेटर,
खनक सुनते ही मेरी Dil की रफ़्तार बढ़ जाती है..
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जो प्यार हकीकत में होता है,
वो ज़िन्दगी में सिर्फ एक बार होता है..
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जब भी उदास होता हुँ,
तेरे ख़याल की छाँव में बैठ जाता हुँ..
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दिल धड़कता है तो डर सा लगा रहता है,
कोई सुन ना ले,  मेरी धड़कन मे नाम तेरा...
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Whatsapp Mix.. Status
Pagli 👸मेरी Aαshiqui 💑 तो  Jio से भी Fast है,
Ęκ☝ बार 💘 Ďįℓ मे उतर के तो देख 👀,
बीना Network 📶 के ही तुझे Unlimited 💏 याद आऊंगा..
                    
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❤प्यार लड़के 👷 और लड़की 👰 के बीच में नहीं होता है,
प्यार हमेशा दो सच्चे दिलो के 💖बीच होता है..                      

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Self trust 😇 is the first secret 🔐 to success..

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A Simple Hello 🗣 Could Lead To A Million Things 🤑.  
                 
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Dekh Pagli 👰, हमारे पास Hero जैसा Look 😎 तो नहीं, पर Status Create करने की Quality है,
जिस पर तेरे जैसी हज़ारों लडकियां 👭 फ़िदा है..

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बाप 👴 के दम पर ☝ तो हर कोई 👫 काबिल 😎 बन जाता है,
बनना है ☝ तो अपने दम 💪 पे रईस बनो ।। 👑👑  

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थोड़ी सी‪ Style 😎 क्या मारी‬ दुश्मनों की आँखे 👀 बड़ी हो 😳 गयी,
अभी तो‪ Entry 🙋 मारी हैं‬ आगे-आगे‪ Dekho ‬होता हैं क्या..    
                
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उसने कहा😌, तुम मुझे ज़हर 😘 लगती हो,
मैंने भी बोल दिया, 😌 खा के मर जा 😜😜..  
                  
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Maturity 👱 is realizing that no human ☺ is more important than your sleep 🛌.

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 If you 👨 can count your money 💴, You are not working 🖊 hard enough 💪.

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 तुम्हारी आँखे 👁 जब भी मेरी 🙎 तरफ देखती है,

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कसम से एक ख़त📖  श्क़ 💕 का लिख भेजती है..

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उसकी ❤ मोहब्बत का सिलसिला 👫 भी क्या अजीब हैं 😘
अपना 💏 भी नही बनाता 💔 और किसी 👩 और का भी होने नही देता.

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बोला था ना जिस दिन मै 👤 खामोश 😏 हो जाऊँगा,
उस दिन तुम 👉 तडप 😨 जाओगे..      

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अब ☝ भी भरा नहीं 😌 है तुम्हारा जी 👩 तो कर लो और सितम,
दिल ❤ तो बाज़ नहीं 😍 आने वाला है ऐसे सताने 😘 से ।।  
                  
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मैं 👦 नही नज़र आपकी 👀 अच्छी 😊 है दोस्तों, 👫
वरना बुराईयां 😒 तो बेहिसाब 😏 है मुझमे ।।  

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Thank God 👼 someone threw 💔 me away so you could pick me up 👫 and love me.

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A real man 👨 looks for a wife 💑, Not another 👯 girlfriend.

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उस गुलाबी चाँद 👰 के चेहरे पे थोड़ा सा रंग 🌈 लगा देते,
तुम जो पास 👫 होते तो हम भी होली मना 🤡 लेते.

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                             Best Whatsapp status collection

  • God made every person different, He just got tired by the time he got to china.
  • I am not fat, I am just. Easier to see.
  • I’m not perfect, I am original.
  • No matter how good you are, you can always be replaced.
  • The worst distance between two people is misunderstanding.
  • Dry fruits are just fruits that have become senior citizens.
  • Girls lie, boys forgive. Boys lie, girls leave.
  • I am… stubborn, and I admit it, so it’s OK.
  • I had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide
  • I only wake up when I can’t hold my pee in any longer.
  • I am not failed, my success is just postponed.
  • Do you know what would look good on you? Me!
  • Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow.
  • Either you run the day, or the day runs you.
  • The most common cause of stress nowadays is dealing with idiots.
  • I don’t hold grudges, I remember facts.
  • People come and go…the best will stay.
  • I Never dreamed about the success I worked for it.
  • Childhood is like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you…
  • Kidnapping? I prefer the term “surprise adoption”
  • People don’t care for you when you are alone, they just care for you when they are alone.
  • You can do anything, but not everything.
  • God made us Best Friends, Because he knew our Mom couldn’t handle us as Brothers.
  • However good or bad a situation is, it will change
  • I fell in love with you. Not for how you look, just for who you are. (Although you look pretty great too)
  • To be trusted, you must be honest.
  • You only live once, so do everything twice.
  • One “BAD” meal won’t make you fat. Just like…. one “GOOD” meal won’t make you skinny.
  • I’m not lazy, I’m just highly motivated not to do anything.
  • I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
  • I learned to GIVE not because I have much but because I know exactly how it feels to have NOTHING
  • I cannot change yesterday, but I can change today
  • I am not lucky. I am blessed.
  • Service is the rent we pay to live
  • Every burden is a blessing for me.
  • There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s MasterCard.
  • A man is great by Deeds, not by birth
  • If you want to impress someone, put him on your Black list.
  • Share your Intentions not your Identity.
  • Smart. Fun. Funny. Fearless.
  • Dream more while you are awake.
  • I am, indeed, a king, because I know how to rule myself.
  • Idiots are of two kinds: those who try to be smart and those who think they are smart.
  • My ambition is handicapped by LAZINESS.
  • Seek respect, not attention. It lasts longer.
  • The better person you become the better person you ATTRACT!
  • Don’t trust everything you see. Even salt looks like sugar.
  • Being challenged in life is inevitable, Being defeated is optional.
  • Choose a lazy person to do a difficult job… Because he will find an easy way to do it.
  • Experiencing life at the rate of 15 WTF’s every hours.
  • Girl are like moving car! Can change the road anytime whenever they find a better road.
  • Some people just need a High-Five, on the face.
  • Silence is better than lies.
  • Do it today, It might be illegal tomorrow.
  • I’m not anti-social. I’m anti-idiot
  • You can do anything, but not everything.
  • I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice.
  • I don’t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.
  • I am only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
  • I am only good at hiding my feelings
  • To live a creative life, we must lose your fear of being wrong.
  • I’m too lazy to stop being lazy
  • Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it. Don’t need it.
  • Aspire to inspire before you expire
  • Live life to EXPRESS not to IMPRESS
  • Flip a coin… If head comes, I am yours, if tail comes then you are mine.
  • The best is yet to come.
  • Hold the vision. Trust the process.
  • Don’t be so quick to judge me. You only see what I choose to show you.
  • Don’t wait for opportunity. Create it.
  • I will win! Not immediately. But Definitely
  • A wise man can always be found alone
  • Don’t take yourself too seriously. No one else does.
  • I was born intelligent but education ruined me
  • Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
  • I hope for nothing. I fear nothing. I am free.
  • I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.
  • I know I’m “Awesome” So I don’t care about your “Opinion”
  • I’m not perfect but I’m Loyal
  • I don’t have Attitude problem. I have Attitude, the problem is yours.
  • I am only good at hiding my feelings
  • I cannot change yesterday, but I can change today
  • I am responsible for my own happiness
  • I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
  • It’s my life, so keep your nose out of it..!
  • I work for money, for loyalty hire a Dog.
  • Down to earth but still above you all.
  • Sorry I Can’t Be Perfect…:-)
  • I like cars with edges and women with curves
  • Money may not buy happiness, but I’d rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.
  • Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  • A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking.
  • Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.
  • Be smarter than your smartphone
  • I am more afraid of leaving my phone unlocked around my family than I am of dying
  • I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.
  • You don’t need a silver fork to eat good food.
  • Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back
  • THINK – It’s not illegal yet
  • I don’t need therapy, I need a hug
  • When I was Born DEVIL said ohh shitt… competition
  • I don’t trust words, I trust ACTIONS.
  • The best way to predict your future is to create it.
  • Your status won’t ever match my status neither in whatsapp nor in reality.
  • Status Unavailable, please try and reload again.I Like it when people look at my status and say “Impressive”.
  • I Like it when people look at my status and say “Impressive”.Marriage is like a workshop. Husband works and my wife shops. LOL!
  • Marriage is like a workshop. Husband works and my wife shops. LOL!
  • Someone asked me, How is your life? I said she is good.
  • I love to work for my dreams rather than someone elses.
  • I m not special person but they just call me “LIMITED EDITION”. ( whatsapp status best )
  • Every second I spend with you is like turning dreams true.
  • Ability to take failures makes you successful.
  • I never live like candle because, I can’t let people be bright while keeping myself in dark.Rather I would prefer to be Sun.
  • Stop checking my status better you have your own.
  • I don’t hate Peoples, I just love Peoples who love me.Straight little  3 words for you – I Love You
  • Straight little  3 words for you – I Love You
  • WAIT! Do you have appointment to see my status. ( attitude whatsapp status )
  • Trying to succeed -> Started with deleting whatsapp account
  • Few things don’t show up but they do exist just like we can’t find heart in an X-Rays
  • My parents are my world, and I go on world tour daily
  • Man and God met somewhere, both exclaimed: “My Creator!”
  • The problem is that you think you’ve time!
  • If the facts don’t fit the theory, change the facts but not theory.
  • The most painful thing in world is being loved and then ditched.
  • Being in love with someone and still single. ( Best Whatsapp Status )
  • I am not perfect in everything but when I am perfect no one is better than me.
  • Eat > Sleep > Regret > Repeat
  • Even the most serious thing in world seems to be funny with that best friend.
  • Truth is superficial and fake is beneficial.
  • Don’t wait for that moment, take the moment and make it perfect.
  • Satisfy the Person Who expect smile Rather Than Surprising the Person Who Never Expected Nothing.
  • I love my job when I am on vacations.
  • The lottery is a myth.
  • Work until you balance matched the number of digits your phone has.
  • You are never too old to chase your dreams.
  • Till the time you won’t fall you won’t Rise.
(WhatsApp Jokes Part-I)

Dad entered Son’s room and found him asleep on his books, tired of exam studies. He walked closer to him..
and played with his hair softly, sweetly
and….
BAAANNNG $%^&* Slapped his face…
and said:
“Last seen on whatsapp 1 minute ago”
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ● 
Ladki wale(ladke se): Beta kya kerte ho…? Ladka: jee, Chief administrator Hun.
Ladki wale (khush hokar): Kaun si company mein beta…?
Ladka: WhatsApp per 2 Groups aur Facebook per 3 Pages ka Admin hun..
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ● 
Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
bola shahjahan ka pota.. Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
bola shahjahan ka pota..
Aaj apna bhi bank balance hota
Agar dada aashiq na hota!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ● 
Aaj phir hamare group ke admin ne kamaal kar diya…
Wo savere savere bank me jaakar so gaya…


kyunki, waha likha tha ki
“Yaha Sone par loan diya jaata hai”
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ● 
Admin ke hath mein naya phone dekhkar Dost bola:
Naya phone kab kharida?
Admin: naya nahin hai, girfriend ka hai!
Dost: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya!
Admin:

Roj kehti thi, mera phone nahin uthate, Aaj mauka mila.. Utha laaya…
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Hamare whatsapp group Admin bachpan se hi kitne buddhiman hain iska ek pratyaksh udaharan:- Jab wo kaksha 5 mein the, to unke shikshak ne kaksha mein puchha:
Senior aur Junior mein kya antar hai?
Keval admin ne hath khada kiya..
Shikshak ne kaha: Shabbas beta, Batao?
Admin: Sir jo samudra ke paas rehta ho wo senior (see-near),
aur Jo chidiyaghar ke pass rehta ho wo Junior (zoo-near)!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Whatsapp group mein maun rehkar,
Sirf messages padhne walo ke liye
Zabardast offer!!!… Bhootpurva PradhanMantri
Shri Manmohan Singh ji
Apna whatsapp group bana rahe hain..
.
Kripaya turant JOIN kar lein!!!
“First come first serve only!” 😉
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
WhatsApp chhote bachho ke diaper ki tarah hota hai… .
Hota kuchh nahin,
Lekin har 5 minute me check karna padta hai!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Attitude of Girls :
When a Boy Sends Dirty SMS .
She Laughs For 10 Minutes,
Forwards That to Her Friends
and..
Then Replies the Boy
I Don’t Like That Kind of SMS!!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Admin jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “Aaloo le lo aaloo” Santa: Yeh to jalebi hai..
Admin : Abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!
Intelligent hai na apna Admin!!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Admin par bijli ka taar gir gaya Admin tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
Use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..
Wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
Aailaa..
Yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
Height of Smiley Uses

º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●

º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●
1st Lady: Patni har janam me wahi pati kyun chahti hai? 2nd Lady: Taaki uss pati ko sudharne me lagi mehnat bekaar na jaaye
º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○●º•○ ●


(WhatsApp Status Part-I )

1). Two fundamentals of cool life – Walk like you are the king OR walk like you don’t care ,who is the king.
2). We live in a Dumb Age where Smartphone’s are thinner and smarter, people are obese and stupid. (Funny whatsapp status)
3). A single word can undoubtedly be a repository of knowledge, provided you’re willing to learn something new.
4). Fight NOT To Lose..Instead 0f Fighting To WIN
5). If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.
6). Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.
7). Anyone else sit on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
8). I can’t find the reason why I like you. I believe that’s what love does.
9). Many beautiful flowers in the world but my flower is you.You are most beautiful than others,I Love you my lovely rose. !!
10). The problem is not the problem; the problem is your attitude about the problem.
11). Yes , I m single , & You’ve to be damn beautiful to change it.;)
12). I act like I don’t care, but deep inside, it hurts.
13). When there’s a will, I want to be in it.
14). Laugh alone and the world thinks you’re an idiot.
15). Stolen kisses are always sweetest.
16). Are you the drug or the cure?
17). The only way to fix this situation is to go back to when you asked me out…and say no.
18). My two most HATED words..”I PROMISE”..It doesn’t mean $hit to me!
19). Everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.
20). Hatred can be overcome only by love.
21). I am me and I won’t change myself for anyone..!
22). Never do something permanently stupid just because you are temporarily upset.
23). Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
24). Its better to be lonely then to be played by wrong people.
25). Some people are alive only, Because it’s illegal to kill them.
26). Ah, good ol’ trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die.
27). Fikar kar uski jo teri fiqr kre, u to zindgi mai bhut hai hamdard
28). Don’t try to choose which is not Urs..But..Don’t dare to loose which is only Urs
29). Dear Samsung, please also start selling jeans that can accommodate your smartphones.
30). Friendship isn’t a big thing – it’s a million little things.
31). I tried to forget you, but the harder I tried, the more I thought about you.
32). Nobody can teach me who I am.
33). Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it’s wide use three fingers, make sure it’s wet and rub up and down. Yep that’s how you wash a cup.
34). A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.
35). Friendship doubles your joy and divides your sorrow.
36). The strawberry shampoo doesn’t taste as good as it smells.
37). “”My attitude depends on the people in front of me….””
38). Laugh at your obstacles everybody else does.
39). Dear math please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.
40). I am always right, Once i thought that I am wrong, But i was wrong.
41). Hey there….. be there
42). The essence of romantic love is that wonderful beginning, after which sadness and impossibility may become the rule.
43). Kiss me and you will see starts, Love me and i will give them to you.
44). I liked things better when I didn’t understand them.
45). Take out ‘N’ out of FRIEND, and you are cooked!
46). My heart beats only for you..
47). Cheating is easy try something challenging and be faithful.
48). My heart is now a perfect place… with you inside it.
49). I’m cool but global warming made me hot
50). There’s nothing more precious in this world than the feeling of being wanted.
51). Dear people who update their whatsapp message every 30 seconds, there’s Facebook for that reason!
52). A goal properly set is halfway reached
53). Forget the failures and work hard for success
54). The Rose Speaks of Love Silently, in a language known only to the Heart. Happy Rose Day!
55). I think love is fearless.
56). Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
57). It is only possible to live happily ever after on a daily basis.
58). Phones are better than girlfriends, At least we can switch off.
59). I handed her 12 roses, 11 real and 1 fake, and said “I will love you till the last one dies”.
60). Be what you want to be, not what other wants to see.
61). I am a better investor because I am a businessman and a better businessman because I am an investor. – Warren Buffett
62). “It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.” -Warren Buffett
63). Happiness is not the absence of problems. It’s the ability to deal with them.
64). If you want to be rude then you should become a celebrity.
65). Pictures are worth a thousand words.
66). One wise guy invented mobile application Whatsapp…..and his wife added last seen feature :) ??
67). I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.
68). One day someone will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else.
69). Don’t let a bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.
70). We are never ever getting back together.
71). “’Different” and ‘New’ is relatively easy. Doing something that’s genuinely better is very hard.” Sir Jony Ive, Apple
72). I wish I could record my dreams so that i could watch dem later……
73). Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.
74). The toughest part of letting go is realizing that the other person already did.
75). Follow your heart but take your brain with you.
76). I’ll love you till my final breath.
77). All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them but confront them.
78). I think it’s weird when I love you, I think it’s weird when I want you, when you don’t even know I’m there!
79). You won’t have a happy life if you worry about what others say about you.
80). Trust in God, But lock your car.
81). Whenever i have a problem, I just sing, Then i realize my voice is worse than my problem.
82). The most painful memory I have is of when I walked away and you let me leave.
83). When You Sit Alone …You Sit With Your Past … :(
84). At last got to know how to loose weight in 10 days :Just turn your head right right then left and repeat whenever offered any food :):)
85). Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows.
86). Forget your past forgive yourself and begin again.
87). face book is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall
88). We do not remember days, we remember moments.
89). Don’t choose the one who is beautiful to the world; choose the one who makes your world beautiful.
90). The secret of life is not to do what you like, but to like what you do.
91). You’re not perfect, I am not as well, but together we are perfect.
92). I’m not slow….I’m at energy saving mode.
93). I loved you…but I guess that my love couldn’t save his… nothing could.
94). For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.
95). Silent people have the loudest minds.
96). Thin, I am quick; fat, I am slow.
97). Fall in love not in line.
98). Sleep till you’re hungry….Eat till you’re sleepy
99). Just because something isn’t happening for you right now doesn’t mean that will never happen.
100). All girls are my sisters except you.

#Honey Collection


(WhatsApp Status Part-II )

1] This is the beginning of the sentence you just finished reading.
2] Wow now I’m a graduate…….Now thermometer is not the only thing that has degrees without brains .
3] Me and my wife lived happily for 25 years… And then we met…!
4] Life is too short. Don’t waste it reading my watsapp status….
5] formula for success…….under promise and over deliver…….
6] Good morning…let the stress begin
7] Don’t settle for good.Demand Great.
8] I can see you checking my whatsapp status.B)
9] Life is the art of drawing without a eraser.
11] Hakuna Matata!!–the great motto to live life!!
12] “Price is what you pay. Value is what you get.” – Warren Buffett
13] since 1910
14] Am gonna Make my Status………….better you too Focus on your Status only.
15] Eat…sleep….regret……repeat.
16] Sometimes i just wish i’ could fast forward the time to see if in the end it’s all worth it.
17] move on…
18] People are like music some say the truth and rest,just noise.
19] We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.
20] It’s not how tragically we suffer but how miracously we live.
21] Love is that state of mind when a karan johar film becomes bearable.
22] Dream as if you’ll live forever..Live as if tomorrow is last one.
23] Jidhar apna CRUSH hai , udhar hich sala RUSH hai and filhaal timepass k liye only CANDYCRUSH he.
24] My laziness is like 8, when I lie down it becomes infinity 😀 :p
25] Always remember you are UNIQUE………… just like everybody else. …….( more funny whatsapp status)
26] “Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude.My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!”.
27] You don’t have to like me….I am not a facebook status.
28] The only difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude.
29] Don’t be too optimistic. The light at the end of the tunnel may be another train.
30] I just saved lot of money by lic life insurance ……..By not having any.
31] At last got to know how to loose weight in 10 days :Just turn your head right then left and repeat whenever
offered any food :) :)
32] Life is too short. Dont waste it removing pen drive safely.
33] Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.
34] Whattsapp status is loading.
35] I may be wrong…. but i Doubt it!!!

36] Think about it ..every time we look back at ourselves five years ago we think we were an idiot.
37] Happiness is when “Last seen at” changes to “online” and then to “typing..”
38] It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
39] Too busy to update a status. 0_o
40] Tried to loose weight…….But it keeps finding me.
41] I will be back before you pronunce afjkhnfkualnfhukcakecnhkj.
42] battery about to die.
43] I was not busy to be online… I had just gave up on my life when I picked up this girls phone and saw my
contact name as “Free Recharge”
44] I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition 😛
45] Life is like ice cream, enjoy it before it melts.
46] A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work
station..
47] I’am looking for a bank loan which can perform two things..give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
48] Keep moving! Nothing new to read…
49] Math Rule: If it seems easy, you’re doing it wrong.  ……(best exam status)
50] They say we learn from our mistakes; so I m making as many as possible!!!Soon I will be a genius :-B
51] Waiting for wi-fi network.
52] If procrastination was an Olympic event ,I’d compete in it later.
53] One more password got married…!!
54] Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
55] Sleep till you’re hungry….Eat till you’re sleepy.
56] There are 3 types of people in the world- vegetarian, non-vegetarian & Tuesday Saturday.
57] One person’s LOL is another’s WTF!
58] Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
59] I’ll try being nicer if you start being smarter.
60] Love is that state of mind when a karan johar film becomes bearable.
61] Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to monday????
62] Status under construction.
63] Take Life, one cup at a time!
64] I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life;…….. if I die next Tuesday.
65] Life is like photography, you use the negatives to develop.
66] I haven’t slept for 10 days, because that would be too long.
67] Scientist say the world is made up of Proton,Neutrons and Electrons…they forgot to mention Morons like u
:);)
68] Exams!!!!The most creative phase of life :):(
69] Life was much easier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits.
70] Coins Always Make Sound But The Currency Notes Are Always Silent! ?that’s why i’m always Calm & Silent
71] My laziness is like 8, when I lie down it becomes infinity 😀 :p
72] One day, I’m gonna make the onions cry.
73] Second chances are for loosers….either we do it in first place or live it for others.
74] I’m cool but global warming made me hot
75] apni to bass ek hi zeed he…. sar pe Taaj… Sath me koi Khasss aur is kamini duniya pe Raaaajjj !!…
(hindi)
76] Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.
77] Life is planning a pleasant curve for me.
78] We live in a society were pizza gets to your house before police
79] Life is too short. Dont waste it reading my watsapp status….
80] One wise guy invented mobile application Whatsapp…..and his wife added last seen feature :) 😉
81] Stop checking my status ! Go Get A Life 😛
82] Don’t be happy.I don’t Really forgive people,I just pretend like it’s ok and wait for my turn to destroy
them.
83] ” And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.” –
Friedrich Nietzsche
84] Stop waiting for one Day. Today is the Day- Bang-Bang.
85] God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me
86] I don’t like cocaine, i just like the way it smells;)
87] Dear Mario…..I Wasted My Childhood Trying To Save Your Girlfriend.Now, you help me to save mine.
88] Sometimes i just wish i’ could fast forward the time to see if in the end it’s all worth it
89] I started out with nothing and i still have most of it:)
90] You are the product of 4 billion years of evolution, now fucking act like it. ……..(click for more
Attitude status)
91] My “last seen at” was just to check your “last seen at”.
92] I have decided to leave my past behind me ,so i owe you money…..sorry but I’ve moved on.
93] I wish I could loose weight as easy as I lose my pens,keys,smartphone,my temper and even my mind.
94] If you try to pronounce “lmao” you sound like a french cat.
95] Galileo:Great mind…Einstein:genius mind…Newton:Extraordinary mind….Bill gates:brilliant
mind…..ME:Never Mind.
96] I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!
97] If people are trying to bring you ‘Down’, It only means that you are ‘Above them’.
98] I will marry the girl who look as pretty as in her Aadhaar card!!!!
99] I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
100] I meditate for 20 min every morning …..It helps reduce stress of being 20 min late for everything
101] Hey there….. be there.

By:- NAresh Solanki

(WhatsApp Jokes Part-II)

एक औरत अपनी जीभ पर कुमकुम चावल लगा रही थी।
पति: ये क्या कर रही हो?
पत्नी: आज Vishwakarma पूजा है,
शस्त्र पूजन कर रही हूं
 ******************************
दया: सर, ये तो मर गया है।
ACP: तलाशी लो इसकी
दया: जेब में कुछ है,
सर ये तो प्रेम रतन धन पायो का टिकट है।
ACP: इसका मतलब समझे दया, आत्महत्या है यह।!!
************************************
गोलगप्पे खाने के बाद सुखी पापडी ना मिले तो..
लडकियाँ 10 sec के भीतर ही
दुर्गा का रूप धारण कर लेती हैँ !!
***********************************
विज्ञानं के टीचर ने छात्रो से पूछा…
“एलोवीरा” क्या होता है ?
छात्र: सर पंजाब मैं जब छोटा भाई
बड़े भाई को “व्हिस्की” का पेग बना के
देता है.. तो केहता है..”ए लो वीरा”!!
***********************************
इश्क़ में ये अंजाम पाया है,
हाथ पैर टूटे, मुँह से खून आया है!
हॉस्पिटल पहुंचे तो नर्स ने फ़रमाया
बहारों फूल बरसाओ, किसी का आशिक़ आया है!
***************************************
Wife: पूजा किया करो, बलाएं टल जाएगी
Husband: तेरे बाप ने बहुत की होगी,
उसकी टल गयी, मेरे पल्ले पड़ गयी!!
************************************
डॉक्टर:
तुम रोज सुबह क्लिनिक के बहार खड़े होकर औरतो को क्यों घूरते हो?
सरदार: जी आप ने ही लिखा है,
“औरतो को देखने का समय सुबह 9 बजे से 11 बजे तक!”  
**************************************************
पति: कहाँ गायब थी 4 घंटे से?
बीवी: मॉल में गयी थी, शॉपिंग करने.
पति: क्या क्या लिया?
बीवी: एक हेयर बैंड और 45 selfies.
************************************
पुलिस दरवाजा खटखटाते हैं..
संता : कौन दरवाजा खटखटा रहा हैं?
पुलिस : हम पुलिस हैं, दरवाजा खोलो!
संता – क्यूँ खोलू ?
पुलिस – कुछ बात करनी हैं |
संता : तुम लोग कितने हो !
पुलिस : हम ३ हैं |
संता : तो सालों आपस में बात कर लो, मेरे पास टाइम नहीं है ।
*************************************************
Wife: सुनो जी, आपके Birthday के लिए
इतने MAST कपड़े लिए हैं ….
कि बस पुछो ही मत ..!
Husband : Love u Janu ,
लाओ दिखाओ …
Wife: हां, अभी पहन के आती हूं …
Husband : :-O ?$%& …. !!!
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कुछ बच्चे सड़क पर अपने पटाखे जला रहे थे..
अभी एक पटाखे में चिंगारी लगाई ही थी की सामने से एक आंटी आती दिखी . .
सब चिल्लाने लगे …
आंटी पटाखा है …
आंटी पटाखा है …
आंटी पटाखा है …
आंटी मुस्कराई और बोली :
नहीं रे पगलो, अब पहले जैसी बात कहां।।। 
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Santa बस में खड़ा था..
ब्रेक लगी तो एक लड़की पर जा गिरा;
लड़की: बत्तमीज़, क्या कर रहे हो ?
Santa: Engineering.. और आप ??
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पंडीत जी हवन करते समय एक
चम्मच घी आग में ङालते और
एक चम्मच घी अपने ङिबबे मे ङालते जा रहे थे!
पास बैठे अपने एडमिन साहब चिल्लाकर बोले,
“घृतम चोरम, घृतम चोरम !”
पंडीत जी एडमिन साहब को चुप कराते हुए बोले,
“पुत्र ना कर शोरम, ना कर शोरम!
आधा तोरम, आधा मोरम”
ॐ स्वाह ॐ स्वाह ॐ स्वाह !!
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